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A Band of Orcs & El Pasty Guero Interview

18 May 2010 No Comment

A Band of Orcs @ Orctoberfest

A Band of Orcs
10/29/09 @ oRrctoberfest
Santa Cruz, California
By Jeff Longo
& Alex Guzman

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They’re not misunderstood, they’re evil:  A Band of Orcs.  They live to eat your brains & crush your skull with brutal death metal ala J. Double R. Tolkien style. “We’ve come to your realm to summon the apocalypse,;  burn this miserable mud ball,” snorts vocalist Gogog Bloodthroat. Headlining the first annual oRctoberfest in Santa Cruz,  Stubble was granted an exclusive interview & the entire encounter was caught on film.   Enjoy.

Stubble TV – “Scratch that que orco?”
A Band of Orcs

UPDATE: A Band of Orcs 2010 Spring Tour Dates – Click here

STUBBLE EXTRA– If that wasn’t crazy enough we also spoke with their special guest MC El Pasty Guero of the H.F.A.  from the Port of OrKland – (skip directly to interview Click here)

A Band of Orcs @ Orctoberfest

Stubble: So, you guys got Visa’s? They (Homeland Security) let you stay in the country?
Gogog Bloodthroat:
What’s a Visa?

Stubble: So what is a Band of Orcs?
Gogog Bloodthroat:
A Band of Orcs, well; we’ve come to your realm to seize upon everything you own to herald the great dragon Gozorah, and summon the apocalypse and to burn this miserable mud ball!

Stubble: Nice, so what’s tonight?
Gronk!:
oRctoberfest!!

Stubble: The first annual?
Gronk!:
The first! In your puny human realm.


Stubble: So if someone was blind and watching this interview, how would you explain what you guys sound like?
Hulg Elf R.I.Pper:
If they were blind they could hear us!
Gogog Bloodthroat: A hammer splitting skulls.
Gronk!: We sound like hellfire exploding from a volcano!

Stubble: Is it true you guys are a Gwar tribute band?
All:
(laugh)
Gronk!: No! We are gozorg!
Gogog Bloodthroat: They wear costumes, we are Orcs!

Stubble: Take me through a day in the life, what does an Orc do?
Gogog Bloodthroat:
Eat, kill, eat, wench, drink, pillage…

A Band of Orcs @ Orctoberfest

Gronk!: Braaaaiiinsss!


Gogog Bloodthroat:…burn things, torture smaaaaalllll people.
Gronk!: Throw objects from large buildings and watch them smash on the ground.
Gogog Bloodthroat: We also torture large people.

Stubble: So let’s go around the room real quick, introduce yourselves; who you are and what you do.
Hulg Elf R.I.Pper:
Hulg Elf R.I.Pper crunchy guiiiitaaaarrrr!
Gogog Bloodthroat: Gogog Bloodthroat, vocals!
Gronk!: I am Gronk! Shaman and bass player!
Cretos Filthgrinder: I am Cretos…Filthgrinder, and I play lead guitars, and I am the greatest Orc guitar player ever!

A Band of Orcs @ Orctoberfest Stubble: So I first ran into you guys with this crazy video online, and I was like this has to be a real band with some money behind it. What was the name of the video and who made it?
Gronk!:
Into the Maelstrom off of the EP Warchiefs of the Apocalypse
Gogog Bloodthroat: Apocalypse!!!
All: (grunt and cheer)

Stubble: Is it true you worked with Malakai from the movie Children of the Corn?
Gronk!:
Yeah, Courtney Gains he produced the video. Which basically means he organized the shit so…

Stubble: So I take it these days he’s not working with anyone else got some free time on his hands…
Gronk!:
We don’t know, he could be dead for all we know! Jess Brydon directed the video.

Stubble: So where can one listen to Into the Maelstrom?
Gronk!:
Into the Maelstrom is on Warchiefs of the Apocalypse the EP.

Stubble: So this is your second record you said?
Gogog Bloodthroat:
First!

Stubble: So how long um….Scratch that.
All:
(laugh)

Stubble: So at this point the Orcs turned ugly and were done answering my questions. Gronk! started leaning into me from my left pushing me & I’m pretty sure he tried to take my wallet. Then bald ass Hulg Elf R.I.Pper jumped in my face. I started swinging but I was too late Hulg already scratching my back, then suddenly, just in time, Alex does an Indian Jones sliding a broad sword across the floor which I use to fend off the hoard… .see Stubble TV for rest of the story…)

Stubble would like to thank A Band of Orcs for taking the time out to talk with us. . Check out their breakthrough video Into The Malestrom directed by Courtney Gains (Children of the Corn) & follow up EP WarChiefs of the Apocalypse.

Intro : Jeff Longo & Josh Kutras
Video camera: Alex Guzman
Photos: Jeff Longo
Transcription: Josh Kutras


2010 Spring Tour
-May 21  Catalyst Santa Cruz, CA
-May 26  Avalon w/ Green Jelly, Bomb & Scary, & In the eye of Molocchio Santa Clara, CA
-Jun 19  S.C.U.M.fest – First Annual Watsonville, California
-Jun 26  On the Y Sacramento, US
-Oct 23  Cheyenne Saloon w/ Sothis Las Vegas, California, US


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BONUS – El Pasty Guero Interview

Apparently created specifically to guest MC oRctoberfest, El Pasy Guero of the H.F.A. wants you to “express yourself,” but you ” gotta mask up yer ugly!”Oh did i mention he’s fucking crazy?  Check it out.

Stubble: Hey this is Jeff with Stubble Musiczine and I’m hanging out with…
El Pasty Guero:
El Pasty Guero of the HFA (laughs) heh heh heh!

Stubble: What the hell is the HFA?
El Pasty Guero:
The HFA that’s the Hidden Face Army; gotta mask up yer ugly, exactly what we be doing! Throw on a mask, it doesn’t matter what kinda mask; express yourself, and come express yourself with us.

Stubble: So, who are you? And we’re here at oRctober fest?
El Pasty Guero:
oRctoberfest 2009 in Santa Cruz CA, downtown at the Vet’s hall.

A Band of Orcs @ Orctoberfest

Stubble: Who are you, and what do you do?
El Pasty Guero:
I’m with my homeboys, A Band of Orcs; and I am actually a Horc-half human/ half Orc my own best enemy you know what I’m sayin? I’m here with my homeboys Holzfeuer from Arno Corps; Arno Corps from the East Bay and he’s down there rockin’ out right now. We’re hosting the whole event and uh, we’ve already got 2010 in the planet that’s how great this is.

Stubble: Alright, you’re fuckin’ crazy man that’s all I have to say.
El Pasty Guero:
Sorry.

Stubble: You from Oakland?
El Pasty Guero:
I’m from Oakland, the Port.

Stubble: Does everyone from Oakland look like you?
El Pasty Guero:
No, just the people from the port! Hit me up on line MySpace, we’ll get you masked up get you a trading card; we’ll do it that way that’s how we do it out here!

www.aBandofOrcs.com – Heavy Metal Lair– For news, tour dates, album info, and merch

www.myspace.com/elpastygueroFor news about El Pasty Guero and the HFA

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